I was ashamed and uncomfortable in my body.

It took me a long time to learn to love yourself and accep yourself is fundamental for inner peace and happiness, let me tell you about one of our first dates.

I think it was our second date with my now-husband, we had met at art school and both loved photography. We went out taking photos of old buildings in Port Adelaide. The weather was warm and sunny, but I was so ashamed of the extra curves around my belly that I refused to take off my jacket. I was grumpy and moody because I was uncomfortable and ashamed of my body.

My poor date had no idea what was wrong with me. Looking back, I realise I had let my own insecurities get in the way of having a good time.

It’s amazing how we can be our own worst critics, isn’t it? We look at ourselves in the mirror and focus on every little imperfection. We compare ourselves to others, to the models in magazines, friends, or the influencers on social media. We think that if we don’t fit into a certain mold, we’re somehow not good enough.

But the thing is, there is no mold. There is no one “right” way to look, to act or to be.

We are all unique, beautiful individuals, with our own strengths and weaknesses, our own quirks and idiosyncrasies. And that is something to be celebrated, not ashamed of.

It took me a long time to learn to love myself. It took me years of struggling with body image issues, of feeling like I wasn’t thin enough, pretty enough, good enough or normal enough. It took me years of comparing myself to others, of trying to fit into a mold that didn’t exist, of hating myself for not measuring up.

I felt different. I was different. I didn’t look, act or think like everyone else.

I discovered meditation, journaling, self care, finding like minded friends, and doing what I loved. I started to realize that my worth as a person had nothing to do with my appearance. I started to remember that I was so much more than just a body. That I had talents, passions and dreams that had nothing to do with how much I weighed or what size jeans I wore.

Slowly but surely, I learnt to accept myself for who I was. I remembered to love myself, flaws and all. I stopped comparing myself to others and started focusing on my own journey. I didn’t lett my insecurities get in the way of my relationships and my experiences. It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

I still have bad days, where I look in the mirror and wish I looked different, or when I compare myself to someone else and feel inadequate. But those moments are few and far between, and they don’t have the power over me that they used to.

You are beautiful, unique and amazing, just the way you are.

So to anyone who is struggling with self-acceptance or to remember to love yourself, I want you to know that you are not alone. It’s a journey, and it’s not an easy one, but you are worth it.

Don’t let anyone, especially yourself, tell you otherwise.

And thankyou to my husband, who had the patience and understanding to see past my insecurities and love me for who I am, I am so grateful for you.

Remember to love yourself.

Peace and Love, Toni xx