Growth is uncomfortable, leaning into your vulnerability is the deep inner work

The holiday is over, it wasn’t all sunsets over the beaches.

Growth is uncomfortable, leaning into your vulnerability is the deep inner work. It was a great reminder to practice what I preach!

A great morning routine will keep you grounded and energised, and as a result I am able to live true to myself and my values. My boy and I were sick for the first week, so I fell out of routine. I stopped prioritising myself, stopped meditating, journaling and dancing, and made it all about the kids. What’s wrong with that you ask?

I’ll tell you. When you stop prioritising yourself, you rely on the happiness, positive energy and goodwill of others to lift you up, which more often than not, doesn’t happen. There was plenty of groaning and moaning, a lack of motivation, inspiration and gratitude. I fell into old patterns of behaviour and thought, which led to despair and loneliness, so I felt a disconnection with myself.

I felt like a failure as a parent and partner. Growth is uncomfortable.

I got stuck in my head. You know those moments where your thoughts are so negative and repetitive that you tell yourself to shut the f… up and actually feel like hitting yourself?

I attribute a lot of this to being sick, being out of my comfort zone, overwhelmed being in a cramped space with children that needed me. Of course am taking responsibilty for my own behaviour. As an introvert and an empath, I need my personal space and time. I need to meditate and check in with myself daily to release my negative emotion and replenish my energy levels by moving my body, preferably to some good EDM – Electronic Dance Music.

So I reset, reprioritised, and repurposed.

Sometimes we get so stuck, we can’t see the way forward. I knew the way, I was being stubborn and playing the VICTIM. I should know better, but sometimes we fall prey to our own shit storm. Luckily for myself and my family I was able to find my way through the shadow realm and see the light again. I took responsibility for myself, leaned into my vulnerability, connected with myself through deep inner work and BOOM there I am again. Able to live my values and feeling free to be me.

Prioritising my peace, allows me to love. 💜

Growth is uncomfortable, leaning into your pain and vulnerability is hard work. It’s taking responsibility, taking charge of yourself, admitting when you’re wrong, asking for what you want and need. A constant, conscious choice to be the master of your destiny. The master of your energy, your power!

I share my vulnerable stories with you, so you know healing is a journey, as life is a journey. It’s waking up everyday and consciously choosing to live according to your values. To live in connection and flow with life.

Peace and Love, Toni xx